Public Blurtation
Jan. 17th, 2008 03:28 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
wwcitizenSitting quietly with my Blackberry playing a game, I overheard three disparate people discussing various things. Often it's very distracting to me when seemingly intelligent people in public employ a "This-One-Time-At-Band-Camp" conversational cadence (the same tone of voice that ends every sentence, with an upswing, with the subtext of willing acquiesence and non-confrontation). I couldn't help but cringe and wince at the end of every sentence, and it was truly that that I was listening to. Added to the mix was an equally annoying guy who was postulating various "issues" in the news.
And then it happened: They got onto a topic that enticed me to get involved for no good reason - Britney Spears. They were asking each other (maybe 5 times), "I wonder what's happening with Britney?" "She seemed like she was going to pull out of it all." "When's she gonna make her comeback?" "What's wrong with her?" "Why does she do the things she does?" "She's acting so stupid lately - I wouldn't let K-fed take MY children!"
Suddenly, I blurted out uncontrollably (and without looking at them directly), "She's bi-polar and suicidal!" and then continued spewing, "Her dad and mom have been wanting to commit her, but couldn't do it; they said, 'She's gotta come to the realization that she need help, but she's not been there yet till now,' and so her parents are trying to have her committed for a period of time..." And then out of pure desparation in trying to stop myself, I almost yelled at myself, "Why do I know this and why do I care?"
The entourage muttered something and went back to their conversation. I was so embarassed and do not for the life of me understand what came over me to blurt out that stuff in public with people I didn't know and who were irritants next to me on the subway. I must have looked like a socially inept geekish nerd - playing his little game on his Blackberry blurting out random facts or news.
Still learning so many things about myself and my buttons.
And then it happened: They got onto a topic that enticed me to get involved for no good reason - Britney Spears. They were asking each other (maybe 5 times), "I wonder what's happening with Britney?" "She seemed like she was going to pull out of it all." "When's she gonna make her comeback?" "What's wrong with her?" "Why does she do the things she does?" "She's acting so stupid lately - I wouldn't let K-fed take MY children!"
Suddenly, I blurted out uncontrollably (and without looking at them directly), "She's bi-polar and suicidal!" and then continued spewing, "Her dad and mom have been wanting to commit her, but couldn't do it; they said, 'She's gotta come to the realization that she need help, but she's not been there yet till now,' and so her parents are trying to have her committed for a period of time..." And then out of pure desparation in trying to stop myself, I almost yelled at myself, "Why do I know this and why do I care?"
The entourage muttered something and went back to their conversation. I was so embarassed and do not for the life of me understand what came over me to blurt out that stuff in public with people I didn't know and who were irritants next to me on the subway. I must have looked like a socially inept geekish nerd - playing his little game on his Blackberry blurting out random facts or news.
Still learning so many things about myself and my buttons.
